Now Is Forever Until It Eventually Ends

let's cut our nails before we go to bed so we won't scratch ourselves when we're out for the count
let's talk before we're drown in incommunicado
let's grow a halo in the midst of radical hatred


let's not waste time
don't kill time
that's just how long you live
let's not take it away

I talk to the walls

so many things are bothering me lately
I wish I had someone to talk to, one who won't judge
but I had none


and these things are still bothering me
lately it seems like I'm losing to reality
nothing seems to ever goes my way


I used to be ashamed of admitting that I feel lonely
but now I don't anymore
I feel lonely sometimes
everybody does
it's just a natural thing, as things change and moments are replaced


I'm longing for some things now
and longing is waiting with a bunch of hope that develops into expectations
when you're not God, expectation is a bad thing
expectations kill surprise
and life is full of surprise


But if I live without desires
might as well I'd just be dead
Desire stimulates changes
and life is all about changes


so what now?